I'm reading a book right now by John Piper on purpose and how not to waste your life. I get frustrated a lot of times because my own mind has its own ideas of how my life can best be used to help protect/save others and further the Kingdom of Jesus Christ on earth. I see consumerism everywhere. I see the obsession with beauty and possession or material things. I go to a shopping mall and I feel like my eyes have been opened. I see it all through different eyes because I used to be one of the girls on a mission to "acquire" more. Like a drug addict I would shop for that extra little fix that would make me feel better for a little bit or receive a sense of newness. It never lasted... My finances were constantly being choked and I wasn't able to save or put money away for the "rainy days" that always came. For years now I've heard tips on how to get out of debt, why you need to get out of debt, etc. I had good, pure motives and I tried many times. I failed over and over again....
Last summer, I had left my full-time job because I felt my spirit dying more and more each day I was in that office between the hours of 9am and 5pm. I quit and traveled in the Middle East for a month in the most sobering experience of my life (more on that to come) and then I returned to the USA, all my money was stolen on the way home and I hit financial bottom. This was last summer I finally realized I was sick and tired of being sick and tired!!! I was broke and though I had many amazing travel opportunities over the years since college I didn't have money to travel anymore until I got a handle on a broken financial situation. As I cleaned out my bedroom last fall at my parent's house and began to pack to return to New York City once more, I was determined to get rid of the majority of my "stuff"!! I traveled so much anyway. Why did I own enough clothes, shoes and accessories for a small village? With an empty bank account and a car FULL of garbage bags I went to the Goodwill and dragged each one inside. I felt less and less burdened with each bag I dropped off. Whenever a future desire or opportunity to shop presents itself I remember the embarrassment I felt inside when I packed up bag after bag, only packing what I wanted to keep. If it didn't fit into my little white car then it WASN'T coming to New York with me!!
Bankruptcy is not an option and I have never considered it. I knew I had options in New York to work hard and reestablish myself. Isn't that was dreamers have done since the great city was founded hundreds of years ago? My dream wasn't to go "Keep up with the Jones" anymore though. It was going to go toward getting financially free and paying back what I owed. World Travel is my desire and the freedom to make my own decisions and not let my finances make my decisions. I'm reading a book that has revolutionized my perspective of money and the role it plays in the life of a Christian. The Bible has more to say about money (about 2,350 verses) than faith and prayer combined... I am soul searching and I plan to find out why a healthy perspective on money is vital to personal freedom!
